Thursday, July 14, 2011

Rochester Area Rejoices at Abby Wamback - World Cup!

Hometown hero Abby Wamback of Pittsford (a suburb of Rochester) scores another big goal in the woman's soccer World Cup! Go Abby Go! "It was the third straight game in which the 31-year-old scored and her 12 World Cup goals tie her with Michelle Akers for the most ever by a U.S. player." Abby previously "scored the winning goal in overtime of the 2004 Olympic final." She later "suffered a broken leg that kept her out of the 2008 Olympics." Read more about it here. (local D&C news), and click here for CNN News. The finals are on Sunday 17th, Japan vs USA. I'm not usually interested in sports, but this ought to be good! GO ABBY!
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More Reading...

Abby Wamback has become a household name by D&C news.

Wamback is leading USA with heart and head - by USA Today

U.S. women one win from history - by ESPN

Thursday, July 7, 2011

“An Apology” – A Response

I’ve received an e-mail from my Ex. Not only did she e-mail me, but she posted the e-mail on her blog with some comments. She mentioned in the post that she will have more post/s on the topic in the future. I will not dignify the e-mail by posting it on my blog, but will only post my response. You will get the gist. Her childish games will hopefully be finished as of today! I’m sick of this! I know that she will read this post. I hope that she will take it to heart and end her foolishness.


The following is a copy of my response to her e-mail…



Beth,

You’re sorry for your “cruel words/posts towards” me “in 2007 and 2008”? What about you’re cruel words/posts from 2009 to now? How can you apologize for something that you continue to do? Nothing has changed. You continue obsessing about me. I believe that your e-mail and blog post are yet another attention getting tactic to draw my eyes to your blog.

It spooked me when I read that you pray for me “every day”. Obviously you think about me daily and still obsess on me. Ek! You continue blogging about me mainly rehashing our relationship of 20 years ago, however, I rarely think of you now. I’ve moved on. I’ve let go. I suggest that you do the same. I’m rarely behind a computer, and I’m getting out and about these days. I’m living real life, in real time, and not focusing on the past. I highly recommend it!

I’ve recognized some time ago that I could not have any type of relationship with you because your mental problems are far worse than I anticipated. I just don’t know how to deal with it. I’ve kept the door open, but no longer. It just seems to feed your obsession and neurosis. Beth, move on! Let go! Do not contact me ever again! Stop writing posts about me! Move on!

I will always remember you as the sweet, nice, sociable, nervous, lady of 20 years ago who loved me. Not as you are now. I wish you well.

DO NOT CONTACT ME EVER AGAIN!

Good-bye

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Related Posts: To the Uncomplimentary Blogger and Therapy and Me
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Friday, July 1, 2011

Peek-A-BOO!

I’m just popping in for a quick update. I want to thank those of you who have contacted me asking when I’ll start blogging again. Well, I still don’t have a computer and it’s difficult to maintain a blog using the library computer. So I don’t think I’ll resume my blog until I can afford one.

I’m doing well. No depression in sight for quite a long while. However, I have lost my “professional distance”, concerning patients. This means that I sympathize with them too much. Not a good thing when you’re a Nurses Aide. I could start crying and getting depressed again. I might have to switch careers. So I’m still working things out. I’m still battling the results of depression and reaction to the sudden deaths of my 3 relatives. I find that it’s easy to fall, but much harder to get up.

My MSW shrink seem to help some, but he is very limited. Some people told me about “tools” that my shrink would give me to help with depression. But 98% of the time he just tells me to get out and about, also to make real time new friends. (I lost friends when I quit my job.) I have to get a new shrink due to a change in my health insurance. Maybe that’s a good thing. He is easy to talk to though.

I’m doing good health wise. I’ve maintained my weight loss of about 50 lbs, but have not lost any more. I have to get back to it now that the weather is nice. Today will be a beautiful day, 80 degrees (27c) and sunny, a good day for a brisk walk.

Same-sex marriage passed in New York State! Hallelujah! We became the sixth state to do so and are the largest by far. They expect same-sex marriages to double in the country! I would love to see the first gay couple get married in my state. But I’m sure I’m not the only one. I would love to say that it ends discrimination, but some jerk in line was spouting off the other day. He said “next people will be marrying animals”. Also, “in the old testament they killed gays”. One lady with children spoke up and said, “Do you have to talk about it here?” She was obviously upset. I never know how to respond to prejudice. At lest someone spoke up. Others had disgusted looks on their faces.


Bravo to Republican Senator Jim Alesi (Rochester area) for being the first Republican to vote for same-sex marriage!



Well, see you later folks!



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Related post: I'll be back in Spring?

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

I'll be back in Spring?

I've been off-line. My old computer died. I've been trying to keep in touch by using the library computer and my not so smart, smart phone.

Unfortunately my smart phone hasn't helped much. I either couldn't see or log into 1/3 of the blogs on my blog roll. I couldn't see many of your pictures, etc. It was also unreliable with a ton of error signs, etc. In other words my smart phone was too unreliable and inadequate for blogging and commenting on blogs. Therefore, I have decided not to renew my smart phone in January and to put the money towards necessitates like food instead.

As for using the library computer, although Rochester hasn't had any real major snow storms, it's been an unusually cold and snowy winter. Rochester broke the December snowfall record. Like most Rochesterians, I've been hibernating this winter and so have rarely gone to the library.

I might be back in spring or summer, but frankly it's very difficult to maintain a blog and stay in touch with my blog buddies without a computer. Hopefully I'll be back soon. I hope you don't take me off your blog roll, Twitter, etc.

I want to thank all my blog buddies especially those on my blog roll. Everyone on my blog roll has enriched my life in one way or another. When I first started this blog I never thought I could have real friends by blogging, but I now believe that I have found some. A HUGE THANKS to EVERYONE on my blog roll for enriching my life!!!

I'll check my blog responses and email in a few weeks, and then I'll be off-line for winter. Have a nice winter!

P.S. I'm still seeing a counselor and working to get my life back on track after years of depression. As always prayers and/or good thoughts are greatly appreciated!

Thursday, December 30, 2010

Happy New Year! - A Barefoot Holiday

I've found Barefoot Wine and will have Barefoot Bubbly Moscato Spumante Champagne and Zinfandel this New Year Eve. I've never tried them. The Pinot Noir is good. I'm packing on the pounds, so will have to put my shoes back on soon, but for now I will enjoy. ;)

Saturday, December 18, 2010

Happy Holidays!

I saw these cute cards yesterday and bought some. This weekend I'm making out Christmas cards and setting up and decorating my little Christmas tree. I'm not going to any parties this year due to anxiety and remnants of depression. I'm doing better, but my life hasn't snapped back into place. It takes time folks. I don't' do well with large groups of people these days.

This weekend I'll light a candle and say a prayer for the friends and family of Jeri Suzanne Horne (Liquid Illuzion). It's hard to believe that it's been two years since we lost her.

Rochester will soon break the record for the most snow in December. The record is 46.2 inches (1.17 meters). We are less than 2" away! I guess I'll soon be using a dog sled to get around. Mush!

Happy Holidays!

Merry Christmas to ALL and to ALL a good night!
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Monday, December 13, 2010

Libra, Love of My Life (part 2 of 2)

Introduction
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This is the second part and conclusion of "Libra, Love of my Life". If you haven't read my first post please do so, or this will not make sense. In the 1980's I would meet Libra and have a 7 year relationship with her. This is the true story in a nutshell. To protect identities I have changed names, blurred dates, and omitted physical descriptions, etc. I wrote each small chapter as one paragraph in order to prevent this from being 3 parts. I also wrote this using two different computers so some chapters may appear different. I hope that you pay attention to the spirit of what I say rather than the form. This post is the second of two and the conclusion.
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The Ring
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When it was all falling apart, when I knew that Libra would leave me soon, I gave her a ring. I couldn't afford anything extravagant on a nurse aide salary, but I did my best. I bought it from a reputable fine jeweler. It was lovely, a 10k gold band with her favorite gemstone and small diamonds. It was something that I should have given to her a year or two prior. I wasn't trying to keep Libra. I knew that she would leave me soon. I just wanted her to have one final small token of my love and appreciation. She gladly accepted it.
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The Inconsiderate Blow
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Libra reveled to me in an uncharacteristically harsh manor that she was sleeping with Sally. She rubbed it in my face. I burst into tears weeping like a baby as Libra held me. She had finally gotten what she wanted, the end of our relationship. But she didn't have to tell me in that way. All she needed to do was merely tell me that she was sleeping with Sally and I would have left her. Apparently she didn't realize that.
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Saving the Cake
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When Libra and I broke up I was heartbroken. It was the loneliest time in my life even until today. I felt unbearably lonely. Libra and I talked, we acknowledged that we were very best friends and we both wanted to save the friendship, (the cake). We decided to continue to see each other, but as friends only. There was nothing physical. We continued to see each other very intermittently for 3 years. Every time her girlfriend protested we had to stop seeing each other for awhile. So it was on and off contingent upon Libra's girlfriend Sally. I couldn't blame Sally, after all Libra was in the habit of getting bored and returning to an ex. I was now an ex and still in Libra's life, but I knew that I would never sleep with Libra again. She wasn't capable of a stable long-term relationship and that was hurtful to me. After an intermittent 3 year friendship I had to say good-bye to Libra. I just couldn't handle it. I don't do well with unstable, inconsistent relationships even in a good friendship. It was too hurtful. Libra and I parted on good terms.
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I Knew This Day Would Come
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Years later Libra would call me because she noticed that a relative of mine had died. She read it in the newspaper obituary section. She offered her condolences, and then the conversation turned. She mentioned that she was in the mist of a 3 year relationship. She asked me if I was "seeing anyone" and if I was "happy". I didn't want to lie, so I just told her that I was "doing just fine", in my most cheerful voice allowing her to assume that I was with someone. Libra sighed a disappointed sounding "Oh". Then she wanted to give me her phone number and rattled off the numbers. I didn't even bother to pick up a pen. It was obvious that she hadn't changed. She still was uncommitted drifting from one ex to the next. I needed more stability then that. Libra was a wonderful person and I cared about her, I just couldn't go through that again. I have never called her, nor will I. My phone number is no longer listed because I only have a call phone now. Perhaps it's just as well.
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Hope for Love In The Future
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I hope to eventually find someone to share my life with. Hopefully I will one day regard Libra as the love of my youth, and another special lady as the love of my, um, more mature years. I am a realist. I've had relationship with different types of women since Libra and am not looking for a carbon copy of her, however, she had some characteristics that I admire and hope to find in someone else. Of course being with someone who is capable of a stable relationship is important to me. Getting along with each other and being compatible is too. So is a strong friendship with mutual admiration, trust, and respect, etc. Id' like enough commonalities to be on the same page. If I ever moved in with a lady it probably wouldn't be in a matter of months, more like years, if ever. Then I might need a "man cave" ;) Right now I'm busy rebuilding my life after losses due to depression so I'm not actively looking for a special lady, yet I don't know who's around the corner. ;)
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Conclusion
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Before I wrote this post I thought in terms of Libra and I having had a 4 year relationship together. However, while I was writing this, and consulting some old calendars, I realized that we actually had 7 years together. It's just that the last 3 years were as Friends, not lover. Now that I'm older and looking back on my life to my precious very best friends that I've had, I count Libra among them. To Libra's credit she gave me about 3 marvelous years of a good stable love relationship before things gradually went down hill. Libra warned me about her commitment issues early on and probably stayed lovers with me longer than she intended for my sake. Libra had many positive attributes including a huge heart. She was truly very "good people". We all have our vices, our flaws, our imperfections. The older I get the more I realize that most people don't change even when they try. The old bad habits and patterns tend to return. I needed a very long-term stable relationship with Libra that she was incapable of providing. However, I recognize that she tried her best. Unfortunately it was an irresolvable impasse. I feel very grateful for the time that we had together and all the wonderful things that we shared. I feel privileged and grateful to have known her and to have been a part of her life. Happiness meant a great deal to Libra and I sincerely hope that she is happy. The song "Something About You", by Level 42 has always reminded me of her. Libra was truly wonderful and remarkable!...Thank you for reading these 2 long posts and for allowing me to share Libra and a bit of my life with you! ;)
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