John Lennon, and Yoko Ono signing "Give Peace a Chance" live in Toronto in 1969. Eric Clapton on the guitar. (3:24 minutes)
I don't know about you folks, but I need a peace break. With all the wars going on. Presidential candidates at each other. Plus some minor bumps in the road in my life. I just need to sing this song a few times, and meditate on peace. Want to join me for a moment? "All we are saying is give peace a chance."
It's Sept. 11.
It's been 7 years since the attack. We have been very blessed that things have been so peaceful in the U.S. But the feeling has died. I mean about 7 years ago when I heard the song "God Bless America" I would stand to my feet, and sing the song/prayer with tears streaming down my face. For the most part that feeling is gone, but so has most of the fear.
I remember 7 years ago walking on the sidewalk at my home, hearing an airplane. I stopped dead in my tracks, and looked up. It was a small plane flying kind of low. I stared at it. Then I saw my neighbor, on the other side of the street. She had also stopped dead in her tracts, and was glaring at that same plane. I knew what she was thinking. I didn't need to ask. Will it attack us? Those intense feelings both positive, and negative are now gone. I guess that's part of the passage of time.
It's been 7 years. 7 in the Bible represents the number of completion. But we are not done. Still at war. Still not safe. I wish it was over with. Will things ever be like they were before the attack?
Some of the facts have been changed so that the woman on the pedestal would be protected.
Have you ever put someone up on a pedestal? You know, thought that they were so special that they could do no wrong? That's how I felt about Mandy. When I lived in Syracuse I met an RN who was very special. She was not only a very caring and good nurse, but she was a Christian, and a perfect example. It wasn't just me that thought so, but many others.
Mandy had more then her share of problems. She had a chronic disease, and was often in pain. She had an abusive husband who was diagnoses as a sociopath. Yet, Mandy relied, and trusted in God so much that she acted like she didn't have a care in the world. She was upbeat, and joyful. She loved helping others, and had a huge heart. Mandy was very approachable, had many friends, and admiring peers. The patients respected, and liked her. She read the Bible on her breaks, and sometimes discussed it with others. More then that she seemed to embody love, joy, and forgiveness. In my book she was the very definition of an nearly perfect nurse, person, and Christian.
Today things changed a bit. Reality set in a bit. I Googled Mandy's name and found out that she had an action of misconduct as a nurse, and admitted to it. Mandy had taken a narcotic for her own use at work. The narcotic was meant for a patient. At first I was shocked, then I started to make excuses for her in my mind- She had a painful, chronic, disease, perhaps she was out of her own medication. Perhaps the patient was a sleep, and didn't need the med. Maybe that's what happened? Or maybe it was worse. Maybe Mandy had been on pain meds for so long that she was addicted.
At any rate, I know that her actions were wrong, and I'm sure that Mandy does too. Isn't it odd that some people can do 99% right, and good in there lives. Then there is that 1% that dashes them down to the ground. It reminds me of that movie Crash, best picture Oscar for 2005. Have you ever seen it? If you haven't, you should! I highly recommend it. Early in that movie you think that you have the good guys, and bad guys all figured out. Then at the end you realize that no one is 100% good, or bad, but we are all just human. We all make mistakes. That's not to say that we shouldn't try to do our best, but one quick wrong decision can mess up a life. I guess we can only do our best, and hope that we don't get slapped down to hard when we make a mistake. Or at lest that those around us, especially our loved ones, will be understanding.
Tonight my heart goes out to an old friend and colleague, her family, especially her children. I hope that her children realize that their mother is special in spite of imperfections.
Note to readers - I do not condone abuse, and personal believe that it is a deal breaker in a marriage. However, I understand Mandy's decision to stay with her husband, and respect her determination, love, and ability to forgive. She was not alone. Family members, some friends, and key people in her church knew. Both her, and her husband were receiving church, and professional counseling. I also would have respected Mandy if she had chosen to leave him.
It's not a good day physically (not feeling well), but mentally & emotionally I feel strong. Could it be that we are as strong, (mentally & emotionally), as we believe we are? Could it be that we can accomplish more if we just believe? Could it be that our perceptions of our self's and the world around us matter more then we think? Could it be that having a positive attitude, and trying, and showing up, is the majority of it?
If this post doesn't make sense I will blame it on not feeling well, and lack of sleep, and medication. ;o) But right now I think that I'm on to something. It seems so simple. Could it be that we are the ones who is making life so complicated? Breathe, just breathe...
As you may know, I suffer from depression. I like music, and that it can be very uplifting. It can be a type of therapy. I listen to the radio, but don't have many CD's. I am looking for some uplifting music. Do you have any ideas? I especially like soft rock, and oldies, sometimes Christian music. It's hard to find something with uplifting lyrics. What do you listen to that brings you out of a bad mood? (What album, or artist, etc.)
Added later - I'm looking for a CD.
My grandmother died. Alright, she wasn't my grandmother, she was my cousins. But I was taught to call her grandma. No one told me that she wasn't. So for the first few years of my life I thought that she was. After all didn't everyone have 3 sets of grandparents? ;o) Eventually I figured it out, but I kept calling her grandma.
She was a nice, cheerful, Italian women who was a good cook, and loved her family. At the memorial, most of the stories centered around her love of family, and cooking. I guess that doesn't sound extraordinary in writing, but if you knew her then you knew someone special. She lived to the ripe old age of 96. The last of the grandparents to die. My three sets of grandparents have all left this earth. A whole generation has died off.
Wasn't it just yesterday that we all were at our summer place at the 1000 Islands? Didn't we all just take a swim together? Yesterday didn't we go boating, and fishing together? Eat freshly caught Pike with home made dressing together? Didn't we just play several hands of cards together; the whole family? Today a generation disappeared.
Those of us who are left have all moved up a generation. My parents generation is now the oldest. My generation is second oldest, and so on. This is the way of things. Such is life. But it hurts! A generation disappeared, but will always be remembered.
The older I get, the more I cling to those precious memories when I was a kid at our second home at the 1000 Islands. Both sides of my family were together. Everyone was alive, young, and had fun together. We had time. When your a kid you think that things won't change. But oh, my, how things have changed!
I don't believe in worshiping the dead, as some people do. But I think that they may be on to something. I won't worship the dead, but I do feel like honoring the dead in a specially way. Some sort of small ceremony, maybe once a month, or season. I will have to think about how to do that. At any rate I do remember.
A generation disappears. Gone, but never forgotten.
I know that I have blogged on a few very heavy topics lately. Since I don't want to scare any of you away, or give you nightmares, I will soon have a second blog.
"Awake In Rochester" will be more for you. I won't get into a lot of heavy personal posts. It will have more humorous, fun, posts. Similar to what it has been, but better, and without the mega drama.
But since I need to get a few things off my chest, and it might be heavy. I will have a second blog. Therefore, blog #2 will be for me. More personal. Letting off some steam Trying to think things through. Kind of an old fashioned privet diary. My darker side. Therapy baby! I think I will have it open to the public, at least at first. So you will be able to take a peek, if your brave enough!
I have a new poll concerning it. Where do you think I should have my more personal, privet blog? You can cast your vote. If you want to elaborate, you can comment here.
This song brings back memories. It was written in 1974, but I never heard it until I was in Bible College. It was one of my favorites. It was written during a time in which they had the best Christian music that I have ever heard. It was during the era called Jesus movement. Enjoy!
The Easter Song by 2nd Chapter of Acts
Linda walked into Betsy's office.
I haven't heard from you in a while. I hope that every thing's all right, Linda said.
Betsy flashed Linda an angry look, then said, I didn't want you to be a friend. I just wanted us to be acquaintances.
Linda replied. I did try. I truly did, but it didn't work. We aren't strangers. We didn't just meet. We knew one other years ago. We were lovers. We were good friends, maybe best friends. You weathered a storm to be with me. You asked me to move in with you. You told me that you were in love with me. Betsy, we have history together.
I know that you are hurting at this point of your life. You have major intimacy issues. You have suffered loses. Sorting out past abuse. You have been hurt, and are very bitter, and angry. I understand why you want to distance yourself, but I can't pretend. I can't act like a stranger to someone whom I shared so much. I care about you, and you don't know how to handle it. Now, don't panic. I'm not in love with you. I don't want to become lovers again. But I do care, and have a connection to you, history with you. I do now, and always will. So I can't pretend to be mere acquaintances. I can't pretend that I don't know you. I have never been good at pretending.
Betsy replied, That was many years ago. People change. You don't know me.
Linda said, People do change. We have had different experiences. Both of us have changed, but basically we are still the same people down deep inside. Doesn't psychology say that our personality is formed when we are young? Basically I am still me, and you are still you.
I know it was a long time ago, but our relationship was significant. It happened. Just because you think you might be straight now, and have been though difficulties, doesn't mean that "we" didn't happen. It doesn't mean that you can negate the fact that we were lovers, and good friends.
You once told me that you were more terrified of me, then of the person who abused you. Your terrified because I care. You have difficulty with intimacy. You want to sweep it all under the rug. You want to abolish our passed.
Betsy, I can't deny our passed relationship. I can't make the jump to being just acquaintances because we're not. We are more then that.
Linda left the room, and as she did she kept the door open a crack.
Related Post: I have Evidence!
On the left side is Sean Lennon with girlfriend Kemp Muhl. On the right is his father John Lennon with Yoko Ono in 1969. Holy double Batman!
Read more at... Daily Mail
I am a peaceful person. I'm not into war, and don't want to even be in some kind of blog war. Even though someone is trying to provoke me by having posts written about me on their blog. I don't want to feed into it. So I'm not going to play this internet war game. I have deleted my post about her. .
I will always have very fond memories of our relationship that we had years ago. Nothing, and no one, not even her today, can mutate, tarnish, or take those fond memories away.
I'm not angry with her. I don't have resentment. I don't have any ill feelings towards her.
The door of communication is open.
